Smutketeers

Archive for November, 2008



Carnal Desires comes out today!!
by Crystal Jordan on Nov 25th, 2008 3 Comments »

Here’s what it’s about:

Centuries after the destruction of earth, several species of altered humans still survive. These shape-shifters are exciting and exotic creatures, and their human forms do little to mask their most primitive and passionate instincts…

IN HEAT
Mahlia is a snow tigress in heat and now that her tiger king has returned to rule the planet Vesperi, she can no longer deny her desperate need to mate. She greets him as a woman, but their desire for sex is uncontrollable as they come together with a primal passion.

IN SMOKE
When Lady Katryn is called back to her home world to join Lord Nadir’s harim, she is curious to learn more about her weredragon nature. What she discovers is a scorching eroticism that consumes her all over.

IN MIST
Dr. Sera Gibbons is one of only two human survivors after a five hundred year cryogenic freeze. Save by the merman Bretton Hahn, she savors the way her caresses her and makes her live out her wildest fantasies.

And if you want to get it online rather than going to a brick-and-mortar store, here’s how:

Amazon.com
Barnes & Noble
Chapters.ca

Funny Kink Quiz!
by Crystal Jordan on Nov 22nd, 2008 2 Comments »

Somehow, I think I’ll still be the least kinky Smutketeer.

Yeah, I know.

It’s shocking.

Appalling, even.

And, still, I’m gonna guess I’m the least kinked out, least pervy, most innocent Smutketeer at my measly 75% kink level.

Just sayin’

(As a side note: I hope they don’t throw me out of the group for not being smutty enough.)


You Are 75% Kinky


If you’ve heard of it, you’ve tried it. You’re that kinky.
You’re open to any and all sexual experiences, as long as they’re safe.

You see the bedroom as the primary place for all your adventures.
But that’s not to say that the bedroom is the only place you get kinky!

Do You Take It…?
by edenbradley on Nov 19th, 2008 9 Comments »

For some reason the theme of many of my discussions lately seems to be anal sex. It’s come up over and over, which I am beginning to take as some sort of cosmic message. I’m not complaining-I’m learning a lot! Which is coming in handy lately (and that’s as much TMI as you’re getting from me today).
For those of you who have done it or would like to, give me your thoughts! Do you like it, hate it? Is it something you’ll do for your partner but aren’t exactly thrilled about it? Is it scary to you? Does it make you feel vulnerable? Emotional? Dirty? Does my talking about it make you feel dirty? I gotta say, it makes me feel dirty, but in a good way. I think. It’s a topic I’m trying to become more comfortable with, and I need your help! No-not that kind of help-I just want to discuss it in an open and mature fashion. Um..maybe ‘mature’ isn’t entirely necessary.
So-who among you is brave enough to come of the blogosphere closet and dish with me about anal? Give me your thoughts, rants, suggestions (What’s the best lube? Best toys?). I want to hear it all!
Meanwhile, here is one of my favorite YouTube videos ever! (WARNING-adult and possibly offensive content!)

Grenades Optional
by Crystal Jordan on Nov 12th, 2008 13 Comments »

I ran across an article over on EW.com by Stephen King called Who Says Real Men Don’t Read?

Being a female and writer, I like that the market seems to be open to females, which it really wasn’t even twenty or thirty years ago, but I also don’t like the imbalance either way. As a librarian, I want boys to read as much as girls. Then again, it’s kind of obvious they misinterpret the romance/ women’s fiction market (nothing new there). Anyway…thoughts? Weigh in!

Here’s the text:

If you catch publishing types in a ”don’t quote me” mood, they’ll tell you the male audience for fiction is disappearing. Agents and editors are constantly on the lookout for the next hot female writer, and why not? At the end of August, 7 of the 10 New York Times hardcover fiction bestsellers were by women, and that doesn’t even include Stephenie Meyer’s mega-selling Breaking Dawn (which the Times considers kid lit, thus not meriting a place on the adult list).

But, to misquote Mark Twain, reports of the male reader’s death have been greatly exaggerated. Women have chick lit; guys have what my son Joe (as in Joe Hill) calls ”manfiction.” And publishers sell it by the ton. Here’s a concept so simple it’s easy to miss: What men want from an Elmore Leonard novel is exactly what women want from a Nora Roberts novel — escape and entertainment. And while it’s true that manfiction can be guilty of objectifying women, chick lit often does the same thing to men. Reading Sandra Brown or Jodi Picoult, I’m sometimes reminded of an old Julie Brown song, ”I Like ‘Em Big and Stupid.” One memorable couplet goes, ”My father’s out of Harvard, my brother’s out of Yale/Well, the guy I took home last night just got out of jail.”

Is this a bad thing? From an entertainment standpoint, I’d say not. Women like stories in which a gal meets a handsome (and possibly dangerous) hunk on a tropic isle; men like to imagine going to war against an army of bad guys with a Beretta, a blowtorch, and a submachine gun (grenades hung on the belt optional).

And current manfiction certainly gives women a better deal than they got in the pulps of yesteryear, when most were presented as barracuda debs in frilly negligees. Robert B. Parker, who chronicles the hard-bitten exploits of that manfiction avatar Spenser (no first name), is also the creator of Sunny Randall, a PI who has had her own hard-bitten exploits. And while it’s easy to become exasperated with Spenser’s longtime partner, Susan Silverman, sooner or later Spenser and his pal Hawk always spring into action. Often with a .38 or a .12-gauge shotgun.

Alex Delaware, Jonathan Kellerman’s entry in the manfiction sweeps, also has a longtime female companion. Robin Castagna is less annoying than the navel-gazing Ms. Silverman, but both need rescuing from time to time, and saving the damsel in distress has been a satisfying part of good manfiction since the days of old when knights were bold and ladies fair went without their underwear. Also, Alex has a gay sidekick, Milo Sturgis. If that doesn’t make him a 21st-century dude, what does?

The fathers of modern manfiction would be Dashiell Hammett, Raymond Chandler, and John D. MacDonald, creator of the world’s first boat-bum PI. MacDonald’s Travis McGee ruled the best-seller lists during the years when reading Playboy was still cool, and may have been the first continuing male character to see women as people rather than just as potential bed partners. Not that Travis was any slouch in bed; he specialized in a form of sexual healing mortal men (such as your faithful correspondent) could only admire. In the 21 McGee novels, the guy must have sexually healed over 200 women. Take that, Dr. Laura!

The best current manfiction writers? I’d say Michael Connelly, Robert Crais, Richard Stark, and Lee Child. Connelly’s Harry Bosch is a dogged cop who takes on the LAPD power structure as often as the bad guys. His current girlfriend, a very liberated woman, is an FBI agent. Crais’ creations — Elvis Cole and Joe Pike — are as tough as the combat boots they used to wear. Richard Stark’s Parker (also no other name) is refreshingly amoral, a thief who always gets away with the swag. In the series’ most recent books he has gained a little warmth thanks to Claire, his own longtime companion.

I saved the best for last. Lee Child’s tough but humane Jack Reacher is the coolest continuing series character now on offer. Reacher has also rescued his share of damsels in distress. He wanders the U.S., sometimes hitchhiking, more often riding buses. He dresses in cheap workingman’s duds bought in chain stores, pays cash, and (this is the part I really love) he used to carry only a toothbrush for luggage. He satisfies the most elemental male daydream, which is at bottom quite sweet: to ramble around and help out when help is needed. Possibly with a Beretta, a blowtorch, and a submachine gun.

Grenades optional.

Eden on Playboy Radio!
by edenbradley on Nov 10th, 2008 4 Comments »

This Tuesday, November 11th, listen to my interview on Sirius Satellite’s Playboy Radio’s Night Calls with adult superstar Christy Canyon! I’ll be talking about my October release, FORBIDDEN FRUIT, which was recently profiled in Cosmopolitan magazine’s Red Hot Reads. I’ll be on around 5:00PM PST. I never know what will happen on the air-Playboy is always tons of fun! Should be interesting…I might read an excerpt, give sex advice on the air, or whatever Christy thinks of-and believe me, she has a vivid imagination! This is my food fetish book ,and I plan to bring Christy a basket of strawberries and whipped cream…Stop by if you can.

Meanwhile, check out my interview online at Joyfully Reviewed!